We are born into this World with an innate wellbeing, greatness and potential to live the life we deserve and want. We are the most incredibly adaptable species which means that our brain is the least hardwired and is sculptured, conditioned and changed after birth. This is an amazing gift, however, it can be the thing that propels use to greatness or limits us.
Beliefs are in effect our inner compass and unknowingly pull us towards or push us away from our desired outcomes. Beliefs hold so much power that people will die for them – they can create or destroy. Our life experiences (especially in childhood), meanings and perceptions shape our sub-conscious and this is the home of our beliefs.
Beliefs are a collection of thoughts about the world that you hold as a truth or a fact about life and how things are. The mind has so much data to take in that it creates assumptions and distortions to make sense of our experiences. In fact, the mind even sometimes deletes data when it doesn’t match with what we hold true! Beliefs are a large part of this filtering system and live in the operating software, mostly outside of your day to day awareness yet this information helps create our perception of reality!
We are motivated to behave in a way that supports our belief systems and if the outside or our behaviours don’t match we will feel discomfort in someway – our psyche will let us know. More often than not if you are not achieving your desired outcomes it will be as a result of a limiting belief you are holding. Because the beliefs you hold true affect what happens next – they produce your outcomes!
“So if you want different results, outcomes or experiences in your life, you would do well to work on changing some of your limiting beliefs about yourself.” (Tony Burgess).
Your beliefs can be powerfully helpful or disabling especially when you become identified with them. Here are just a few that I have come across in my Coaching work:
I’m fat and lazy;
I’ll never be fit;
I’m a poor learner;
I’m average;
I am useless;
I’m not good enough;
I’m not worthy;
I’m unlovable;
I will never be happy;
Fear of failure and the meaning around it;
I will never be slim. I’m fat;
I’m stupid
Wouldn’t it be great then if you could identify a belief that’s unhelpful and then just not believe it anymore and think positively. Try it – it doesn’t work( sometimes maybe for a brief period). That’s because the conscious mind doesn’t drive the bus and it takes more than positive thinking to change glitches in the programming of the software of your brain. You have to look under the bonnet at the engine to make change.
If you aren’t achieving the results you want or feel something is holding you back here are some first steps:
– Carry out a beliefs audit. This exercise can be undertaken gently over a few weeks or even months depending on your pace. Sit quietly with yourself (and perhaps with an open mind ask trusted friends for some feedback) .See if you can identify your own limiting beliefs.
Identify a belief you want to work with and your desired outcome. The 1st step is to suspend the truth.
- Ask yourself if it is helpful or unhelpful?
- Is it helping you to flourish?
- Is it opening up your inner resourcefulness?
- Is it getting in the way of your progress?
- What iffing? For instance you might believe: “This is difficult” . Ask yourself “What if I just need to get out of my own way………..?”
- Start a little debate with your self gently exploring some possibilities. Write them down.
- Mental rehearsal taking yourself through the process. Start visualising making the changes. Be playful and enjoy your rehearsals. If you would like any help with identifying or working with limiting or un-resourceful beliefs email me or call me. My details are on the website.